Insights you'll find in this article...
- The surprising ways resilience can both help and hinder leadership growth.
- Why endurance isn’t always the answer to leadership challenges.
- How one common leadership trait may be keeping you stuck in cycles of “doing.”
By the way, resilience in the face of failure is possible with a private, 10-minute daily routine. Download the Remarkable Resilience Routine designed to boost your resilience as a leader. This routine is a quick daily exercise for building a resilient mindset. By integrating this practice into your daily routine, you'll develop the resilience you need to excel in your leadership role.
I Want Remarkable Resilience!
Is Leadership Resilience a Trap?
Resilience has been sold to us as strength, but sometimes it feels more like a trap. It's long been celebrated as a hallmark of great leadership. We’re told it’s strength, a badge of honor that proves we can take the hits and keep moving. But for many women leaders, resilience doesn’t always feel like a strength. Instead, it feels like an unspoken contract to endure in silence, to never let the cracks show, and to wear a brave face no matter how heavy the weight becomes.
Lately, I’ve been noticing something troubling: resilience becoming a quiet burden. It’s no longer a tool for growth but an expectation—a standard women leaders must meet to prove their worth. Over time, it begins to stifle. It leaves no room for innovation, curiosity, or breathing space. Instead of being a stepping stone, resilience becomes the finish line, and it keeps us stuck.
The Leadership Armor You Can't Remove
For women leaders, resilience often feels like armor they can’t take off. It’s treated as the price of admission to leadership—a relentless expectation to persevere through challenges while maintaining grace. On the surface, this endurance looks like progress. You’re checking the boxes, meeting deadlines, and leading the way. But beneath it all, there’s a gnawing sense of exhaustion, and the question arises: What am I moving toward, and is this even where I want to go?
When resilience becomes a reflex, we risk mistaking motion for momentum. We stay on the same tired tracks, telling ourselves this is the way leadership is supposed to feel—hard, unrelenting, and isolating.
But is it?
Meet Summer M., Award-Winning Illustrator, who discovered newfound confidence and resilience in her professional journey:
"Stacy is absolutely a problem solver and can change your life in ways you never thought were possible. You will gain wisdom that will help you in your situation and any situation to come in the future. I know it can be scary reaching out, let alone to someone you do not know. But if you take a chance, your whole situation and life can change."
Endurance vs. Progress: How Resilience Alone Can Hold Leaders Back
Here’s the danger of unchecked resilience: it can look productive while actually keeping us stuck. Women leaders often share stories of how the constant demand to “power through” left no space for creativity, innovation, or questioning the status quo.
Stagnation disguised as strength: Enduring the same challenges without addressing the root cause doesn’t lead to solutions; it only entrenches the problem.
Burnout in disguise: The expectation to carry resilience as a public strength while privately shouldering the burden drains energy and stifles growth.
In this culture of quiet perseverance, resilience becomes synonymous with doing instead of reimagining.
Resilience + Curiosity: The Key to Great Leadership
Here’s what I’ve learned: resilience without inquiry risks becoming stagnation with a brave face. Pairing resilience with curiosity is what drives meaningful breakthroughs—the kind that redefines leadership, teams, and even personal fulfillment.
Curiosity brings dynamism to resilience. When you start asking questions like:
“What’s really driving this pressure?”
“What if I approached this differently?”
“What’s possible if I let go of this expectation?”
Suddenly, resilience is no longer about enduring the status quo. It becomes a tool for pushing boundaries, solving root problems, and creating meaningful change.
How Leaders Can Pair Resilience with Curiosity
- Reflect on What’s Behind Your Efforts
When you feel the urge to power through, pause and ask: “Am I responding to pressure, or am I aligned with my values and goals?” This simple reflection can redirect your energy toward meaningful actions.
- Reimagine Success
Instead of defining success by how much you can endure, explore what thriving looks like. What’s one small way you can shift toward growth and ease?
- Foster a Culture of Inquiry
Encourage your team to challenge assumptions, brainstorm solutions, and share their perspectives. Curiosity isn’t just a personal tool—it’s a leadership skill that empowers others to think bigger.
- Give Yourself Permission to Rest
Resilience doesn’t mean constant motion. Sometimes, the best way to move forward is to step back and recharge.
A New Kind of Resilience
Resilience doesn’t have to feel like a trap. When paired with curiosity, it becomes a catalyst for growth and innovation. As women leaders, we don’t have to endure silently—we can redefine resilience as a tool for thoughtful, dynamic leadership.
If you’re ready to explore how to bring more curiosity into your leadership, let’s talk. During an Explore Coaching Call, we’ll uncover how resilience shows up in your leadership, and how pairing it with curiosity can open doors you didn’t even know were there.
Let’s turn quiet endurance into bold growth—together.
Women leaders who want to eliminate imposter syndrome, people-pleasing, overwork, and overwhelm leverage my confident leadership coaching to clarify their power skills and confidently command their seat at the table. I’m a women's leadership coach, conference speaker, and the founder of Real Life Resilience.
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