Insights you'll find in this article...
- How societal expectations pressure leaders to always appear confident
- The limitations of traditional self-esteem tools
- The impact of not acknowledging self-doubt
Want to embrace self-doubt but level up your self-esteem at the same time? Discover how with my FREE guide, Climbing the Resilient Thought Ladder! 🚀 Learn practical steps to shift from negative thoughts to positive beliefs in a way that's believable and sustainable. Ready to balance both? Download now and start your journey to becoming a more resilient leader.
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The Fortress of Leadership
You're leading a team project, making decisions that impact everyone involved. Confidence is key, right? But what happens when self-doubt sneaks in? For many leaders, it’s like constructing a fortress—brick by brick, they work to build their self-esteem while attempting to lock self-doubt in the dungeon.
In my experience, far too often, high self-esteem is seen as the cornerstone of success. I notice this when speakers, with bold assertions like “imposter syndrome is a liar,” deliver keynotes filled with loud but superficial messages. They captivate with their self-assured demeanor and well-branded slides, yet offer little real value.
This, to me, is self-esteem overshadowing self-doubt – a doubt that could provide meaningful insight. Perhaps the speaker would be better served by heeding it instead of silencing it.
In leadership circles, self-esteem often steals the show. It's seen as the ultimate key to success—confidence, decisiveness, and leading with assurance.
The common belief is that you need rock-solid self-esteem to be a good leader.
On the flip side, self-doubt gets a bad rap. It's something to banish, or hide. Society tells us that doubt undermines your authority and effectiveness as a leader.
This black-and-white thinking puts a lot of pressure on leaders to always seem confident and in control.
Overwhelmed with failure? Client Kathryn McClatchy shares her perspective:
"My problem was that I was more than a little bit overwhelmed...my own company staff, projects, marketing, taxes, all the things. Stacy got to the root of the problem quickly and efficiently. She helped me prioritize the tasks that needed to be done and in many cases offered not only solutions and sources, but mindset shifts. So I could think about managing all the moving parts with a lot more grace."
The Hidden Struggle: Navigating Self-Doubt in Leadership
Many leaders secretly struggle with self-doubt. They feel isolated because the narrative in society doesn’t leave room for acknowledging this very human experience.
It's like there's an unspoken rule that if you doubt yourself, you're failing as a leader.
Conventional wisdom equips leaders with a self-esteem toolbox. Inside, you'll find tools like focusing on your strengths, keeping supportive people close, practicing positive affirmations, and engaging in self-care. These are the “go-to” instruments for crafting a confident leader.
These tools aren’t wrong. They have their place. But this focus on self-esteem often overlooks the reality of self-doubt. Leaders are told to kick doubt to the curb, as if it’s a sign of weakness or failure.
The truth is, this creates an unrealistic expectation that effective leaders never experience self-doubt.
The common belief is that doubt should be eliminated. But this black-and-white view doesn’t reflect the true complexity of leadership. Doubt is a natural part of being human, and pretending it doesn’t exist can actually undermine your growth and genuineness as a leader.
Good leaders can have high self-esteem and still experience self-doubt.
It might sound contradictory, but it's true: you can be confident in your abilities and still question your decisions or worry about your performance. This flips the usual story on its head and offers a more realistic view of leadership.
The Power of Balancing Confidence and Doubt
Seeing that self-esteem and self-doubt can coexist changes everything. Having doubts doesn’t make you any less of a leader. In fact, it can show humility and self-awareness. When you acknowledge your self-doubt, you become more genuine and experience life more fully.
Finding that balance makes you more resilient and adaptable. You won't collapse under self-doubt because you know it’s just part of the journey. Instead, you use it as a driver for improvement and connect more genuinely with those around you.
Your Takeaway: Self-Doubt can be an indicator for improvement, but doesn't need to collapse functional confidence.
High self-esteem doesn’t mean you’re free from self-doubt. Understanding that helps you lead in a healthier, more sustainable way. This balance gives you the confidence to lead while staying open to feedback and change. Accept your doubts and use them as tools for growth.
Here's how embracing self-doubt can actually strengthen your leadership:
- Humility and Openness: Embracing self-doubt shows your team you're human and willing to learn, building trust and respect.
- Continuous Improvement: Self-doubt motivates you to seek new knowledge, skills, and perspectives.
- Resilience and Adaptability: Balancing self-esteem with self-doubt helps you handle setbacks and criticism without falling apart.
- Genuine Connections: Acknowledging your doubts makes you approachable and relatable, creating a more collaborative and supportive work environment.
And by the way, stop waiting for self-doubt to disappear before you grow your self-esteem. High self-esteem means recognizing your worth, while accepting your doubts.
So, the next time self-doubt knocks, invite it in, learn from it, and keep moving forward. Embrace the beautiful messiness of leadership—it's what makes you real, relatable, and resilient.
Step Up Your Leadership Game: Transform Setbacks into Success with Stacy Brookman
Adding resilience and insight to your leadership navigates deep into reshaping your reactions to failure, leading confidently, and inspiring everyone around you. The journey to weave these strengths into your leadership approach is unique and can feel complex. This is where personalized coaching can really help.
Ready to boost your leadership skills, handle setbacks better, and reach new heights in your career? I invite you to join me for an exclusive Explore Coaching call with me. In our time together, we'll get real about the challenges you face and uncover the opportunities that lie ahead in your role.
On the Explore Coaching call, we'll develop a plan that fits your personal style and goals. We'll focus on practical ways to manage failure, turn tough situations into wins, and step out of imposter syndrome. Our time together will arm you with the knowledge, tools, and ongoing support you need for a rewarding and powerful leadership journey.
To book your Explore Coaching call, just click here to pick a time that suits you. Make this the moment you start leading not just effectively, but with genuine impact and inspiration.
Remember, leading well is about growing every day. With the right support, you can lead with both strength and heart. This is where you lead a team, while also crafting a culture and establishing a lasting legacy.
Cheers to your leadership journey, where you conquer challenges and inspire all with undeniable grit and wisdom.
Women leaders who want to eliminate imposter syndrome, people-pleasing, overwork, and overwhelm leverage my confident leadership coaching to clarify their power skills and confidently command their seat at the table. I’m a women's leadership coach, conference speaker, and the founder of Real Life Resilience.
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} } #block-1695978967366 .feature__image, [data-slick-id="1695978967366"] .feature__image { width: 100px; border-radius: 21px; } .authorfeature { display: flex; align-items: flex-start; position: relative; } .authorfeature__image-container { flex-shrink: 0; /* Prevent the image from shrinking */ margin-right: 20px; } .authorfeature__image { max-width: 150px; height: auto; } .authorfeature__content { flex-grow: 1; /* Allow the text and button to take the remaining space */ } @media (max-width: 767px) { #block-1695978967366 .authorfeature { flex-direction: column; /* Stack children vertically */ align-items: center; } #block-1695978967366 .authorfeature__image-container { margin-right: 0; } } /* flush setting */ /* margin settings */ #block-1703958985190 { margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; } #block-1703958985190 .block { /* border settings */ border: 4px black; border-radius: 4px; /* background color */ /* default padding for mobile */ padding: 0px; padding: 0px; /* mobile padding overrides */ padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; } @media (min-width: 768px) { /* desktop margin settings */ #block-1703958985190 { margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; } #block-1703958985190 .block { /* default padding for desktop */ padding: 0px; /* desktop padding overrides */ padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; } } /* mobile text align */ @media (max-width: 767px) { #block-1703958985190 { text-align: center; } } #block-1703958985190 .btn, [data-slick-id="1703958985190"] .block .btn { color: #464646; border-color: #8be400; border-radius: 4px; background-color: #8be400; } #block-1703958985190 .btn--outline, [data-slick-id="1703958985190"] .block .btn--outline { background: transparent; color: #8be400; }
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